My doctor’s office is walkable from work, and on the way back from my last routine checkup I took a slightly different route than last time. I was in a rush, so I couldn’t stop, but something exciting caught my eye: food. The name of the place was B&D Halal Restaurant, which by itself wouldn’t raise an eyebrow. Foods bearing the “halal” designation are all over midtown, and usually take the familiar form of lamb and/or chicken over rice sold out of a cart, in levels of qualit

The first thing you should know about our show in Phoenix is that it takes place at the Hard Rock Café. Last time I set foot in a Hard Rock Café I was eleven years old. My family and I had won a contest. We got a tour of MTV Studios, and dinner at the Hard Rock Café in Times Square. We had a blast, but even at eleven I was aware that the whole thing was a bit cheesy. Maybe it has one of the hundreds of guitars that, like, Kip Winger bought in the heady days of musicians makin

We roll into San Francisco around midnight, and pull up to Different Fur Studios. Different Fur put the show together, and the powers that be have graciously allowed us to stay the night. This is the biggest and nicest studio I have ever set foot in, and recording there is definitely a long-term goal. For now, we are very excited to crash and play a show. They have plenty of couches and even a sauna. A sauna! For real. Before the end of our stay I will have my first shvitz, w

The best thing that happens in Olympia besides making a friend at the thrift store is eating this banh mi. We have to get the oil changed, and I notice that across the street is a pho restaurant. We have seen a lot of Vietnamese things around Washington, so I figure it is probably legit. I am not in the mood for pho, as it is a terrible travel food, but I figure they would have a banh mi, and they do. It is small, but just filling enough, and every ingredient is perfectly bal

The drive from Fargo to Spokane is 17 hours in good weather, but it is not good weather. The first day is all right, freezing cold but not actually hazardous. The second day is pure hell: mostly downhill, foggy, snowing, hailing, half a lane of highway unusable, surrounded by semi trucks that could easily kill us with the slightest wrong move. There are actual runaway truck ramps, which are provided in case a truck’s brakes fail. You steer towards the ramp, and gravity makes

After Minneapolis, it’s on to Fargo. We drop off our stuff at The Aquarium, which is the upstairs of Dempsey’s Public House, a bustling Irish bar with karaoke and free popcorn, serving affordably-priced beverages to young and old alike. The guy who helped us set up the show invites us over for homemade curry. His living room looks like this, and I am immediately won over. Neil Young, pictured, on the stereo when we arrive. And that is a real live Hammond organ. We help chop v

Gas stations are an important part of tour. Depending on your gas mileage and average bladder capacity, you’ll be stopping once every one to maybe three hours. Some gas stations are minimal affairs, a single booth the size of a toll booth with a crappy little cooler of soda. Some are ambitious one stop shops, housing all manner of fresh and semifresh food items, tchotchkes, car parts, and video gambling interfaces. Here’s one of my favorite fixtures: This is a F’Real smoothie

Milwaukee gave us a warm reception. We played at the Riverwest Public House, a place I would absolutely hang out if I lived in the area. Positive and community-oriented in its approach, LGBT-friendly, solid drink specials every night, plus $1 shots of rotgut whiskey all the time. Good books, comfy places to sit on whilst reading the books. Plus a proper stage and reasonably good sound. But most notable was the pizza we got towards the end of the night, when we remembered that

We roll into Jonah’s parents’ house around 2, and immediately get to snacking. Mostly standard things: chips, salsa, nuts. But then Jonah busts out this amazing substance. It is called Ekte Geitost, it is from Norway, and it is made of goat milk. My initial impression was that it looked like dulce de leche, and as it turns out the cheese is actually boiled and caramelized as part of its production. How to even describe this cheese? Very rich and fatty, you eat small slivers r

I’ve been going to Commodore for years now. It has great happy hour (3 dollars for good stuff like Harpoon, in a neighborhood where it’s not unusual to pay 6), and is a convenient ride home for both me and my friend who lives in Park Slope. But until yesterday I had never ordered any of the food. I was tempted, but always held out for Oasis on the grounds that it was cheaper and still quite good. Contrary to popular belief, the best thing to get at Oasis is not actually falaf

I am far from the first to shout out the superlative quality of NY Pizza Suprema, but let me just say: believe the hype. This pizza has the perfect crust, plenty crisp but with a slight doughy resilience. The cheese always forms those awesome little brown bubbles that mean it is done. The sauce is bright and a little sweet and balances the cheese perfectly. It is all in all a great way to take the edge off the dual indignities of a Polar Vortex and just generally being in Mid

It’s no secret I love Vanessa’s Dumpling. Ideally the one on Eldridge, but they’re all a certain level of good. Everything  is cheap, and their frozen vegetable dumplings are a staple in my house (along with my homemade peanut sauce, recipe to come). But, counterintuitively, the best thing about Vanessa’s Dumplings is actually not dumplings at all. The sesame pancake sandwich is available at many Chinese restaurants, including nearby competitor Prosperity Dumpling, but Vaness